too much information

as soon as i saw from whom the message was, i knew it couldn't be a simple, random "hi" email.

turns out that i was right.
"I have some tough news, Lanna passed away this morning after battling cancer for two years."

and one minute later, an email from someone else:
"____ is getting married in August!"

i couldn't really process either thought, the mental journey on the narrow pathway between the two events was too arduous.  too much information.  and, this was following two busy weeks of baby birthing explosions for friends and family. 

we get information so quickly nowadays, some of it warm and fuzzy and some of it forces you to gain new perspective on life.  (forgive the cliche, i haven't the energy to write anything more original.)  i think about how thoroughly unnatural it is to be looking for an obituary in the newspaper for a 30 year old.  as i sifted through the listings this afternoon, i realized that everyone else was a septuagenarian or octogenarian, on average.  i think about her sweet parents burying their only daughter (who definitely drove them crazy during high school) but turned out pretty great afterward.  i think about all those hours i spent with her starting from second grade until senior year of high school.  how many school events, shows, parties, random outings did we have?  afternoons at her house?  emails exchanged?  pieces of gossip tossed?

in all honestly, the last time i spoke to her was probably the summer after high school graduation (1998).  but she really was a significant part of my life for ten years before that, my childhood. and now she's gone.  too much information.  can't process.

rest peacefully, lanna b. kelley.  you are missed.